good intentions

i was just trying to make some toast.

flip the man into the pan

This animal lives in my room.

You think it's cute, don't you? You are wrong. This animal is evil.

It rummages around at night keeping me from falling asleep because all I can do is dream about getting eaten alive by a disease-carrying vermin who uses his super-rodent powers to somehow scale a 9-inch plastic, mouse-proof container, bust into said container and burrow through my winter clothes and find my stash of European dark chocolate and contaminate it with his germy mouse fangs and then when I use the same amazing chocolate to bait the electrocution chamber I have lovingly prepared for the unwanted guest, he evades it and instead decides to eat the paper receipt that has fallen behind my dresser causing me to get moody and paranoid and write really long run-on sentences.

This animal is evil and must die. I don't care if it is quick or slow. I don't care if it has a wife and kids at home. I don't care if it just made the team and was going to go pro someday. The mouse must die.